Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

Dear Penthouse Forum: I never thought this would happen to me...

One hot, summer night when I was a single 30-something, I came home from a day in the corporate trenches, washed my face, put on a tee shirt and boxer shorts and camped out on the sofa to watch whatever was on the E! channel.

Someone knocked on my door and set off my "single woman alone in a house" panic button.

I grabbed the phone (just in case), flipped on the outside light and peered through the peephole.

There, standing on my front porch, was a fireman. A young, ripped, sweaty fireman wearing just his undershirt, suspenders, protective pants and boots and fire helmet.

Bow-chicka-wow-wow.

"Just a second," I yelled, rushing to get my housecoat. There was no time to put on a bra and makeup.

I opened the door and he said, "Sorry to bother you ma'am, but we had a report of a gas leak in the neighborhood. Have you smelled anything unusual?"

And these words came out of my mouth: "I smell nothing but good."

Gah!