Every morning, I walk into the office and say, "Good morning, Tom," in the exaggerated "Great to be here, great to see you!" voice I developed at a previous job to psyche myself out when I was thinking, "I hate this place and you personally." It became a subconscious habit.
Tom is the office manager, whose desk is in the lobby. He's very businesslike and focused on his work, so he has no time or use for pleasantries. He grudgingly, without looking up, mutters a gruff, "Morning."
I always say his name because that forces him to answer me. And it irritates him. And that amuses me.
His morning vibe is "You are irritating me." So his 5 p.m. vibe is "I would rather stab you than acknowledge you."
My sing-song "Good night, Toms" were getting nowhere. So I started saying random, ridiculous, farewells he'd hear above the unnecessary noise of people walking past while he's crunching numbers.
Recent examples* include:
So long, Tom
Rock on, Tom
Peace out, Tom
Keep on truckin', Tom
Sayonara, Tom
Catch you on the flip side, Tom
Nite-Nite, Tom
Check ya later, Tom
Godspeed, Tom
May the force be with you, Tom
Good old Tom has taken to responding, "See ya, Leigh Ann." He doesn't take his eyes off what he's doing, but he can't help but like me. Begrudgingly.
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*Need more examples. Send 'em in! Gotta keep this train rolling.
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THE LIGHT EPHEMERAL
1 day ago
5 comments:
Well I guess I often use "Seizures" (ya know, as in 'see ya') when leaving the casa although it may not be appropiate if Tom or a loved one is prone to them. There is my other fave from my buddy Dwayne: "Plant you now, dig ya later"
I propose a different musical number with interpretive lyrics every evening.
Gotta go with the stand by, "See ya, wouldn't want to be ya." always a favorite with second graders.
With Steve P recommending musical numbers I suggest the following...
Tom, get your plane right on time...
Tommy can you hear me?..
Hang down your head Tom Dooley...
you get the idea.
how about" That's what She said, Tom"
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